intellectual feline

June 06, 2013

Today Was Okay Posted at 9:28 PM

Ugh, I have been reflecting on today and found out ways to keep myself much less stressed out over my family problems. Besides Joong, the only other thoughts I have that keeps my emotions in check are my hopes for the future and that things eventually get better. I just needed to stick by them and it turns out that I was perfectly fine. Is this even the worst situation I have ever encountered? My brother was always the problems child anyway. So it's not like this behavior isn't rare.

I feel as if my reputation at school is slowly sinking back down to the soil where it sprouted originally. I have been sending Richard onisan some crude messages that was only for fun and it got worst and he showed the teacher/homeroom teacher and she was really amused at what I wrote. But when she asked another teacher what STFU meant, the teacher told her and her mouth was wide open in complete shock but still amusement. My classmates were giggling and all and they said that i wasn't the innocent little goody girl that everyone knows.

I wish I could hide under blankets and sleep this off. It's no big deal but my math and latin teacher will never EVER see me that same way ever again. I even started asking for food during class from my classmates and they willingly gave me some. And I was always against eating during class and despised my classmates who do. But I guess my opinions on things do change throughout the course of the year.

Also, besides all that personal stuff, my exams are in TWO weeks. I have gotten study guides from a few classes already and plan to add and review the information. I really want to make my dad proud of me when he sees that I aced all my exams. I never failed a single one, but I know I can do better!

These days, I'm tired and leisurely slacking off as if life was just a slice of cake and I can eat it whenever I want. Also, I'm planning to finish my journal before summer starts so I can have a whole journal just for my summer vacation! Then I decided that after the completing the next journal that i bought but didn't use yet, I would have to go back to composition notebook. I really miss writing in a composition notebook and is it really worth to buy a journal under my financial circumstances?

Days drag by doesn't it? UGH. I mention that I'm tired a lot. I have work tomorrow so I won't have to attend mass. >.< That's a good thing for me because it seems like a waste of time. I wonder why Catholics go to church EVERY Sunday. They don't really have to but I think Christian is somewhat better since you don't have to go to church every Sunday Still thinking about it.

David has been drawing in this purple notebook and I'm so curious. I get really excited about people who draw and I wanted to go up and ask him but never got the courage. What if he gets mad or annoyed? I wouldn't like that. I remember during our last days in 6th grade that I sat with the guys because of Auen and David was there and he was drawing. I guess we were somewhat like friends through Auen and since me and him broke up, me and David just grew apart and he became hostile towards me. I wonder why...

This skirt is really cute. I saw it on Tumblr and wish I had a lot of pretty clothes :3
But besides that, I wouldn't want to be so rich. There are kids who are overly spoiled and it pisses me off, their attitude that is... They're so snobby. But I'm not saying all rich people are like that.

I really like this skirt too :3

Oh yeah, in English class we watched scene something of Romeo + Juliet. That's the version I'm watching. The actor for Romeo is really cute and the girl is just so prettyyyyy <3 Oh my gosh, they had sex at one point but the farthest we got was them taking off each other's clothes. Then the teacher skipped the whole scene. :O

Oh yeah, during advisory today, I had to tell my rose + thorn. I said my thorn was my family problems but I had to pass for my rose because I didn't think about it yet. Then when everyone else finished with theirs, I only came up with the show I'm watching. My peers were asking whether it was some kind of anime or not and I'm like, "It's a Korean Drama." Richard started snickering and I got really... I didn't really feel anything actual. Then I was like," Don't hate Richard!" All my peers were like OHHHHHHH as if I've done something epic against another person. :3 I felt so victorious today :D

Speaking of Richard, I just remembered something about Andrew Sok. Both of them are my class brothers and I really like the both of them as close related... I don't know. But I really favor Andrew over Richard because he's nice despite his violent acts and brushing people off. When someone asked him if I was a friend to him in front of me (but I was not looking in their direction) he was like ,"No" and it really hurt. But then he said,"She's my sister." And I felt lighter after that. One time, he brought an EXTRA crispy Kit Kat into the van. He sits with me in the van when we get picked up from our jobs. I was looking at it one time because he set it in the middle. Jordan already took off a chunk because Andrew didn't want him to have all of it. But half an hour into the drive back to school, I was staring at it and then Andrew caught me looking and offered it to me. I broke half of it and gave the rest to Andrew. He didn't really eat at all... but then he said I can have all of it and if I want, share it with Richard and Wilfredo. So since I don't really eat candy often because of acne stuff going on... I gave the rest to Richard and Wilfredo who fought over it. O_O And I just ate mine quietly.

He always teases me. He pretends to attack me. He does so many things to me and it's pretty misleading. But deep down, he's really nice. He's funny, he makes me laugh. He's really like a big brother and I've always had that type of connection with him. :3

Richard and Andrew likes to tackle each other during class too. O_O Typical, violent, brothers.